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Friday, May 1, 2009
why i'm letting go T_T

Ito ung sinabi ko sa self ko last night while I was crying myself to death:

I think it's really better na mag-let go na lang ako. It's not that I don't want you anymore. I really want you. I really do! Maka-happy kng makasama kita even if it's just for a while. Ma-miss kita agad everytime marealize ko na nasa digos ka na pala. And if bumibisita ka ng davao, always akong na-eexcite kasi alam ko na we could always at least one day together. Ung mga simple stuff such as those, maka-happy talaga siya super. At ma-happy pa rin ako lalo pag ma-think ko ung moments na un (even ryt now).

Pero for the past few days, lalo na during the eco-conservation fair, I realized na you are MORE happy when not with me. Other people can make you more happy than I make you. You don't deserve to have me kay feeling ko, with me, you won't be really that happy. Maybe before I used to give you the same happiness as what the others could give you right now, pero kung naga-diminish man ang level na nabibigay ko, then it's not anymore healthy and it could be a good reason on why i am letting go.

People would want to live HAPPILY ever after with their destined person. And I don't think I could give you that happy ending. Kaya as early as now, I'm moving out of this "thing" (I don't even know how to define it, I'm sorry) kasi I think mas ma-hurt lang ako in the future if I'd let this thing get deeper.

So, I think you should let go of me din (if you should ba in the first place).

Before I go, I really had a great time with you kahit hindi man naging tayo. Having you around was something really fruitful in my life. Kasi with you around, it makes me really happy that even ganito ako na person, someone still cares for me. Thank you so much!

Bye T_T